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Criteria for relating to younger & older Widows well.

1 Timothy 5:3-16Healthy Relationships in God's Household

Criteria for relating to younger & older Widows well.

English original

Paul's concern to identify needy widows and provide for their proper care forms the backdrop for a discussion of the problems of younger widows, some of whom had apparently become influenced by some of the false teaching in Ephesus.

Paul instructed Timothy on how to care well for widowed women, who were particularly vulnerable to exploitation in Ephesian society. Indeed, 'some' had been influenced by the false teachers and were sinning against the community (cf. 1 Tim 5:13-15; 2 Tim 3:6-7). Paul distinguished between older and younger widows, and between widows who had family resources and those who were all alone (5:5)

Honor widows

English original

Timothy was instructed to care for widows (literally "those who are really widows") who are in need. The care of widows, who frequently had great material needs, is a major theme in the Old Testament (Deut. 24:19-21; Isa. 1:17; Jer. 22:3; Zech. 7:9-10; Mal. 3:5) and was a special concern of the early Church (1 Tim. 5:16; Acts 6:1; Jas. 1:27). The covenants of God contained families, and thus the emphasis on families in the New Testament continues (cf. household baptisms or oikos baptisms, etc.). Hendriksen summarizes:

Strikingly beautiful is what Scripture teaches with respect to widows:

(1) God is "a father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows" (Psa. 68:5).

They are under his special care and protection (Exod. 22:23; Deut. 10:18; Prov. 15:25; Psa. 146:9).

(2) By means of the OT tithe and "the forgotten sheaf" he provided for them (Deut. 14:29; 24:19-21; 26:12, 13). At the feasts which he has instituted, they too should rejoice (Deut. 16:11, 14).

(3) He blesses those who help and honor them (Isa. 1:17, 18; Jer. 7:6; 22:3, 4).

(4) He rebukes and punishes those who hurt them (Exod. 22:22; Deut. 24:17; 27:19; Zech. 7:10; Job 24:3, 21; 31:16; Psa. 94:6; Mal. 3:5).

(5) They are the objects of Christ's tender compassion, as is clear from the Gospels, especially from the Gospel according to Luke (Mark 12:42, 43; Luke 7:11-17; 18:3, 5; 20:47; 21:2, 3).

(6) In the early church they were not forgotten. It was the neglect of certain widows which led to the appointment of the first deacons, so that in the future widows might receive better care (Acts 6:1-6). And according to James, one of the manifestations of a religion that is pure and undefiled is this: "to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction" (James 1:27).

Today the New Testament Church is to continue to care for widows. While there is no longer an Old Testament "tithe," there is New Testament "giving." We should joyfully and generously "give" (not tithe) both individually and collectively through our Churches to help meet their needs. See "The Old Testament Tithe?," "The New Testament Tithe?," and "Giving as a Part of Worship?" below.

Honor widows, real widows. In ancient, patrilineal societies, where land inheritance laws privileged sons, widows were dependent utterly on their extended family and tribe for material support. This economic reality was mitigated by Old Testament Law (cf. Ex 22:22; Deut 24:19-21; Ruth). The Prophets clearly warned God's people when they neglected their covenantal obligations to widows (cf. Isa 1:17; Jere 22:3; Zech 7:9-10; Mal 3:5). The care of widows is an identifying marker of 'true faith' in the New Testament community (cf. Acts 6:1-6; Jas 1:27).

If a widow has children or grandchildren

English original

Widows, if they had family, should first of all be ministered to by their families so the church would not be unnecessarily burdened (1 Tim. 5:16) and families would fulfill their covenant obligation to the Lord. Milne explains:

It was not thought right that the church should be forced to care for widows who could be well provided for by their own families (see further 1 Tim. 5:16). In addition it was good for the younger generation to put their faith into practice by providing for the needs of their older relatives. The family is the original social unit created by God (Gen. 2:24), and is appointed by him for the training of all its members through mutual caring and sharing. Paul is prescribing here for Christian children, but in 1 Tim. 5:8 he makes it clear that this kind of duty also belongs to the natural instincts of human beings in accordance with God's moral law written on their hearts (Rom. 2:14f.).

Kenneth Gentry is informative regarding families in the Old Covenant. Here is what he says about the family unit in Infant Baptism: A Duty of God's People:

The Bible teaches that God establishes the family as a Creation ordinance of perpetual obligation (Gen. 1:27-28; 2:22-24; Matt. 19:4-6). That the family is of central importance in the Bible is evident upon the following considerations: (1) Numerous family genealogies are preserved in Scripture, thus demonstrating a concern for the preservation of family lineages (e.g., Gen. 5; 10; Num. 1). (2) Families were considered a high and holy heritage from the Lord (Psa. 127; 128; Isa. 8:18). (3) To be childless is lamentable (Gen. 25:41; 30:1; Exod. 23:26; Deut. 7:14; Psa. 113:9; Jer. 22:30). (4) Responsibilities before God center around family life (Deut. 6:4ff; Psa. 78:1-8; Prov. 13:22; 19:14). (5) Express moral obligations protecting the family are established in the Ten Commandments (Exod. 20:12, 14, 17).

Consequently, in the Old Testament God all-merciful specifically instituted his gracious covenant with family generations as beneficiaries of the covenant, rather than restricting the covenant to individuals. His mercies and blessings were particularly promised to the families of believers, as in the case of Noah (Gen. 9:9), Abraham (Gen. 17:2-7)) and others (Deut. 28:4; Psa. 103:17-18; 115:13, 14). Also in keeping with this principle of family solidarity, his chastenings and curses ran in family generations (Exod. 20:5; Deut 5:9; Hos. 9:11-17).

If a widow has children or grandchildren. Paul placed the primary responsibility of providing for widows on the family as an expression of their love to God and each other. Having defended the right to marry and the importance of rearing children within marriage, Paul underscored the opportunity of younger widows to remarry

A real widow

English original

Genuine poverty often drove widows to exemplary lives of prayer (see "Prayer: Why Should We Pray?" below) and faithful dependence upon God. For such widows, the Church is to be the visible hand of God in providing for needs. However, those that live "for pleasure" or are self-indulgent are dead already, living a decomposing life, a life in spiritual decomposition. For more on decomposition see "How Judas Died Matthew 27:5 Acts 1:18" below.

a real widow. In Paul's view, only older widows (see 5:3), who had no family support, were eligible for financial support from the church. As image-bearers of equal dignity, Paul expected both contributions from and for these widows. From them, he expected consistent prayers that exemplified the dependence on God to which each member is called. Moreover, as members of Christ's social body, Paul expected God to provide for their material support through the church.

Preach these things.

English original

Regarding the care of immediate family, Paul says, "Command these things so that they might be blameless." See WLC 129, 141, 142; WSC 74. Milne states:

The obligation to care for one's own family members when they are in genuine hardship is a double one for church members. Christianity preaches love as the apex of religious behavior (Matt. 22:37-40). Since this love is for fellow human beings in general, including even enemies (Matt. 5:43f.; Luke 10:25-37), it most certainly includes the members of a person's own family. Jesus set the pattern of this for all time when in circumstances of the greatest personal discomfort he made direct arrangements for his widowed mother before he died (John 19:25ff).

Preach these things. Literally, 'command these things that they may be blameless.' Again, Paul is correcting false appropriations of the law. These clear instructions help everyone in the community know how to relate.

He is worse than an unbeliever.

English original
he is worse than an unbeliever. As mentioned in note 5:3 above, the care of widows, orphans and immigrants is a mark of 'true faith' in the covenant community (cf. Acts 2:44-45; 4:32-35; 6:1-6; James 1:27). But, that care starts at home so as not to burden the limited resources of the church to provide for its members, who have no family. For Paul, failure to provide material goods for family members and church members is spiritual malpractice

Enrolled as a widow

English original

Some have seen here an official order or office of widows with duties to perform (1 Tim. 5:5, 10); others have seen an agreement whereby some widows provided certain services for the church in exchange for material support. Most likely the list was simply one of widows who were to receive support from the Church (1 Tim. 5:16). This list constituted a portion of the larger group of widows mentioned in 1 Timothy 5:3-6.

Paul mentions "over sixty." This is a general expression reflecting the cultural perspective on the age after which remarriage would be most unlikely (cf. 1 Tim. 5:11-14).

Paul notes here certain qualifications: (1) Literally, "wife of one husband" (cf. 1 Tim. 3:2). (2) "If she brought up children." The verbs in this verse are in the past tense. Paul's concern was not with what the widow might still do for the Church, but with what she had accomplished in her life. Note the closely connected concept in 1 Timothy 2:15; 5:14. (3) "Washing the feet of the saints" is a humble expression of hospitality in a culture where people wore sandals and walked dusty roads (cf. John 13:4-5). Jesus commanded his disciples to wash each other's feet (John 13:14-15). (4) A general qualification of "helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds." Milne states:

The widow eligible for church aid is well-known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the saints, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds (1 Tim. 5:10). These qualifications illustrate the sorts of caring and practical ministries expected of Christian women. Good deeds are enjoined on all Christians (Eph. 2:10; Tit. 2:14), but widows seeking the endorsement of the church needed to have a record of good works as godly women and mothers. These good works are now itemised. 'Bringing up children' suggests that they have successfully managed to work through the rigourous demands of being a mother and homemaker. 'Hospitality' and 'washing the feet of the saints' point to an open house where visitors and travellers were always welcome in the Lord's name (Rom. 12:13; Phil. 2:2). The feet-washing could be literal or metaphorical: Jesus encouraged both by his own example (John 13:3-17). Finally the worthy widow would have helped all kinds of people troubled in mind and body, and generally have been known for her devotion to good works.

enrolled as a widow. Some traditions within the church have interpreted an order or office of widow from this text. But, Paul's emphasis is on developing a list of 'real widows' who should not be overlooked in the distribution of food or funds (cf. Acts 6:1-6). Not younger than sixty. This is the age under which it was expected, at least in Greco-Roman culture, that widows would remarry. A wife of one husband. Like the requirements for elder and deacon (see notes 3:2, 12), widows who received material support from the church were expected to be of consistent moral character, providing a good example in their relational practices.

Devoted to every good work

English original
5:10 devoted to every good work. The same character and wisdom is expected of an older woman in the church as is expected from older men: fidelity in marriage, faithfulness is childrearing, service to fellow believers and hospitality towards strangers. See notes 2:15; 3:1-7, 8-13.

They revoke their first commitment

English original

Younger widows should not be on the list of widows. The reasons for this are explicit - physical ability and faithfulness. Younger widows are still able to support themselves and they are of an age where they could remarry. Additionally, while a widow's desire to remarry is not in itself ungodly (1 Tim. 5:14), the natural urge to marry again may be so strong that they may even marry an unbeliever (1 Tim. 5:15). These types of marriages may lead them away from Christ, thus bringing "judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge" (1 Tim. 5:12). Kistemaker remarks:

But the possibility existed that also younger widows might apply. However, the importance of the work required whole-hearted devotion. If the interests are divided, so that the widow's mind, even during the performance of her spiritual functions, is pre-occupied with the idea of finding a suitable husband, her efficiency will suffer. . . . This is one of the reasons why the application of younger widows (those under sixty) should be rejected.

they revoke their first commitment. Paul's advice to Timothy about 'younger widows' in the Ephesian church is cautious, because some have forsaken their fundamental commitment to Christ (see note 5:15) to become 'gossips' and divisive instruments of the false teachers (see 2 Tim 3:6-7).

Give no opportunity for the enemy to slander us

English original

Evidently there were some widows whose behavior was not in keeping with the gospel, bringing reproach upon the Church (cf. 1 Tim. 3:7; 6:1; Tit. 2:5, 8). While not all widows would engage in unchristian conduct, some may.

The phrase "saying things they ought not to" may refer to false teachings (cf. 1 Tim. 5:15; 1:3; 4:7) or simply to gossip and improper intrusion into the lives of others ("house to house" meaning circuit of the houses; cf. Acts 19:13; 28:13). Instead of this ungodly, sinful conduct, younger widows should marry, have children (cf. 1 Tim. 2:15), and properly manage their homes.

Paul gave a lot of attention to widows, perhaps because some of the younger widows had come under the influence of the false teachers (2 Tim. 3:6-7) or been enticed by sensual desires to abandon the faith (1 Tim. 5:11-12). Lea remarks:

It was urgent for Paul to speak and for the younger widows to respond. Some who had pledged a commitment to widowhood were not living as the true widow of 1 Tim. 5:5, 9-10. They had abandoned their trust in God and had become involved in gossip, false teaching, strife, and discord within the church (1 Tim. 5:15).

In 1 Timothy 5:16 Paul urges "any woman who is a believer [having] widows in her family" to use her time, wealth, or both to care for the needy widows. Kistemaker states:

Needy widows are first of all the responsibility of those who are nearest to them; for example, children, grandchildren, women of means who stand in a relation of closeness to them. Let them then do their duty. Not only is this morally the right thing to do, but there is also a very practical consideration. The church has its hands full as it is. It does not count many rich people among its members (Mark 10:25; cf. 1 Cor. 1:26). Hence, it should not be burdened (weighed down with too heavy a load; for the verb see also 2 Cor. 1:8; 5:4; then Matt. 26:43; Luke 9:32; 21:34). Without this extra burden it will be able to assist "those who are really (what is implied in the name) widows." . . . These are the widows who are completely destitute, having no one to support them. If everyone does his part, it will be so much easier for the church to care for these widows. Truly, a lesson also for today!

give no opportunity for the enemy to slander us. Paul understands the church as a unity. Those who are vulnerable need support not only for their own sake but also for the sake of the whole community. Each part of the household must work for the sake of others, because Satan, whose name means 'adversary,' always opposes God's people. At Ephesus, 'some' in the church have 'turned aside' and joined the opposition.

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