There's a little boy in our church and if you ever want a good theology or If you want to study healthy emotional responses look the children. They haven't been corrupted yet Children they seem to come into the world with their emotions fully developed and they know how to respond to things And they're not embarrassed by them yet. There's a little boy in our church who was learning the short the children's Catechism his parents were teaching him a different question every night and the question came up where is God and the answer of course is God is everywhere I was everywhere and he his eyes got really big and he looked at them and said is he in my room? And they're like yeah, he's in he's in your room. He's everywhere and He didn't sleep in his room again for the next three nights. He was scared to death. He didn't want to be in there alone with God and You might sound funny to you, but I think that's right. That's actually a healthy response Fear is a very healthy thing and it and God has designed us with this this emotion that That makes us seek safety It makes us seek the safety of crowds. It makes us run to people and And he was right if you're afraid of something you go to your parents and he was right that the Lord isn't as a frightening thing If you really believed in God, he would you would be afraid of him seeing you So he had this very healthy response God Designed us with that emotion and he goes so far the Lord says and Psalm 111 in other places that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom You see he's created us so that we will fear him When when faith plus fear meet we begin to look for a place to hide Fear makes you run for cover And you realize there is no place that can cover you from the Lord and so you have to end up turning toward them and And he makes peace with you and you realize then that he's not angry with you But he's put your sin away and in his son and and you come into him and ultimately there you find rest and you find security and Comfort from not only the fear of him but from all your fears that that's how God created us to function and He created us with this this healthy gift of fear that ultimately Leads us to safety You know, I'll say right but a Lot of us have a corrupted fear This anxiety anxiety leads us to isolation and paralysis and a complete loss of peace And so what we want to talk about today is what a healthy fear looks like Contrasted with anxiety now. This is serious. We started it two weeks ago We're gonna do it for the next four or five weeks and we're gonna look at a different motion each week last week We looked at sadness and we looked at its corrupted wicked step-brother depression This week we're looking at fear and It's corrupted wicked step-brother anxiety. Now don't Understand that you could choose different words for these things that the words aren't interchangeable They kind of are interchangeable whatever. I but I'm trying to distinguish two things right don't quibble with me on that I'm trying to distinguish healthy fear that leads to life and unhealthy anxiety that leads to a complete loss of peace and So to do that we're gonna read this great song from Psalm 3 That David prayed when he was surrounded by his enemies and Absalom and kicked him out of Jerusalem. So please stand as we read from Psalm chapter 3 And ultimately hopefully we'll see that fear moves us toward people safety and rest Fear moves us toward people safety and rest here the word of the Lord O Lord, how many are my foes? Many are rising against me Many are saying of my soul. There's no salvation for him and God But you O Lord are a shield about me my glory and the lifter of my head I cried aloud to the Lord and he answered me from his holy hill I Layed down and slept. I woke again for the Lord sustained me I will not be afraid of many thousands of people who have set themselves against me all around arise O Lord save me. Oh my God for you strike all my enemies on the cheek You break the teeth of the wicked salvation belongs to the Lord. You're blessing beyond your people This part of the reading of God's word all men are like grass and all of our glories like the flowers of the field the grass Withers and the flowers fall but not God's word God's word stands forever. Please be seated
Healthy fear moves us toward safety and rest anxiety moves us toward Isolation and exhaustion and that's what I want you to see now the first thing I want to do here is talk about a healthy fear And if you don't if you try to take this Psalm out of all context and just say this is all that we have The Bible teaches us about fear you'd be led to say well They're the fears bad and I have nothing to fear and since I'm in the Lord I'm fine. You I can't have this image of somebody going out in a battlefield saying you know shoot me if you want to If it's the Lord's will for me to die I die and that is not what's going on That's presumption that's putting the Lord to the test that is not what is going on in this text We know that because the text tells us it was when David was fleeing absent He assumes that you've read Second Samuel and so off but I'm not going to assume that you read Second Samuel So let me tell you what Paul David did when Absalom kicked him out of Jerusalem he ran He gathered his mighty men around him his army his most reliable and faithful warriors He placed spies in place in Jerusalem so he could find out what was actually almost planning He escaped from Jerusalem went all the way over the Jordan River and went to One of his allies homes and stayed in that home where he was provided for and fed He did all those things because he had a healthy fear his fear is is operating correctly See I think I Think fear gets a bad rap You know we put no fear on the back of our pickup trucks We act like fear is a bad thing There's great fears the reason I'm still alive fear's probably the reason you're still alive You want to know who has no fear? All you have to do is Google the words Florida man dies You do that Google search for any day You'll find Florida man dies shooting fireworks from top of head true story, you know Or Or look to the stories of the Instagram models who went to the top of the Grand Canyon and and in the midst of posing for pictures about how showing how they have no fear fell off into the Grand Canyon and died That's what happens if you have no fear you act foolishly Fear's a good thing fear makes us seek security fear It makes us respond in a wise way and remove ourselves from danger That's what David did In the same way I just kind of wanted to take this apart a little bit and see the difference. I think it's important right now gosh I don't remember another time when there's been more confusion between acting in faith living by faith and living by presumption and foolishness So we're going to talk about that Acting and living by fear using fear the way God designed it and makes us seek relationships What's the first thing you remember being afraid of? Probably the dark And what did you want? You wanted your parents to be with you Your mom sent you out you have to take the trash out in the middle of the night or what felt like the middle of the night That's probably eight o'clock Star count there Will you go with me? Fear looks for someone to go with me What is David praying in Psalm 23? Yes, though I walked through the valley of deep shadows. I fear no evil Because you're with me Fear drives us toward people when I was in Jackson, Mississippi Living as old or cottage that had some righted out spots and that one night a squirrel Bedded down and begin to build a nest in our walls and You can hear him running around the attic and then he's got down to a wall and I think he got confused or what but he started barking in the middle of the night And a squirrel's bark sounds kind of like a squeal is like all night And I was driven so crazy that literally I loaded my shotgun and I pointed it at the wall I said beyond got think he's here and she talked me out of doing that which was Because she has a healthy fear um And then and I knew the next day I knew all I had to do is crawl up in the attic and throw his nest away and plug up the hole I was so scared Because I had to climb up this ladder to put the ladder under the hole and push the the board out of the way and stick my head up into the attic And I just knew that squirrel's me right there Just biting me on the node by my nose straight off probably and I couldn't do it until I was in seminary I was I was went to class and I went to lunch. I was telling a friend about it and he goes let's go get it Come back home. He holds the ladder. I just climb right up there and climb up into the attic Why because I had somebody with me. It's a magical thing almost fear having someone with you Strengthens you it takes your fear away Fear seeks relationships fear seeks out safety What does David do he gathers his men and he gets out of town to a safe place fear is why you're still alive fear makes you buckle your seat belt Right It's what we do is why we prepare and act Fear makes us act You know why I graduated college So I was really afraid of failing out of college and And so I studied and I went to bed at night and I worked hard I got up in the morning and I studied and I studied because I was afraid I was afraid of failing out and that was not some random fear. It was very clear and present danger That's what a fully formed healthy fears looks like What is a fully formed healthy fear of COVID-19 look like according to Dr. Anthony Fauci it means you wash your hands Wear a mask Avoid crowds Stale size much as possible Doesn't mean you shelter in place necessarily doesn't mean you live in terror. It certainly doesn't mean you just Go around acting like it didn't exist Wash your hands people it's hard for me. I hate washing my hands Go you know wear a mask avoid crowds. That's what living wisely looks like and what is that healthy fear lead us to It leads us to a place of rest David slept in the midst of his enemies Mean there are thousands lined up around me. I Lay down and sleep. I wake up in the morning because you're still with me See David's made peace with the Lord And he's done everything he can do So he rests That's that's what fear is supposed to get you to a place where you rest
That's healthy fear we'll talk more about how it gets his dress in just a second, but first of all let's talk about those of us who have Broken sense of fear anxiety when we When we received this building when we purchased it and finally it was kind of hours one of the first things we had to do was get an emergency alarm I mean a burglar a burglar alarm security system. Thank you. That's easier to say a security system put in and And so we got Stanley to come put a security system in and it's a weird system It's all on computers if I want them to unlock a door. I don't have a key I have to call them and they unlock it from a distance It's very odd to me. It's still odd seven years later, but So what they had to do to set up the security system is they went through the entire building and they mapped it out in their oral computers and They mapped out every door and then every night at 1 a.m The system would check itself and make sure all the doors were closed One door was never closed And for like six months. I'm not exaggerating. We have witnesses here who can tell you for like six months and Every night we would receive a phone call one of our members a deacon Admin somebody would receive a phone call saying you have a door open No way down. You I can't turn the alarm off unless you go up there and check it and We every night somebody different will come up and check it no doors are open no doors are open no doors are open and finally I got frustrated enough that I just went to the office they have an office here in town I found out where it was I went in there and I sat down and I said I'm not leaving until you fix this and if I were you I'd really want me out of here and so they came and they walked through it and you know what they found out They had typed in that there was a door where there was no door the door that was open every night didn't exist and so we couldn't close it and So the security system was going off non-stop Fear is our security system Some of them were broken and they never stopped going off and That's that's kind of what anxiety looks like for always looking for something they it's like the security system is The alarm is going off and we're constantly looking for a reason why instead of seeing the thing that we're supposed to be afraid of moving to safety moving to To people to relationship We're just already have the alarm going off and we're looking for something for a reason for it to be going off and And that's what we said very similar in that way to what we talked about last week Remember sadness has got healing emotion that we grieve a loss A depression is is general sadness is a specific. I'm sad about my mother dying. I'm sad about losing my job I'm sad about a thing Depression is just general sadness looking for a reason to be sad In the same way fear is specific David feared absolum You should fear COVID-19. It's a real thing It's therefore you act and you move on Anxiety is general Anxiety lives in the land of maybe I'm afraid because because my children might be at risk. I may not have done enough something might happen tomorrow And we can't turn it off Anxiety lives in the land of what if it's it's looking for something to be anxious about fear Drives us to something trustworthy David went to his mighty man. He went to his allies David went to the Lord anxiety because Because the alarms already going off and it doesn't seem like you can get it away from it and anxiety draws you into yourself Fear looks for a stronghold anxiety kind of seeks control If I can control all the possible outcomes Then I'll be safe Well, yes, if you could control all the possible outcomes you would be safe But you can you can And so the more you realize that and the bigger your life gets and the bigger your circle of friends gets The more you realize that you can't control an anxiety begins to produce anxiety And it becomes a spiral that you can't get out of And that's why feared seeks companions. I'm safe if you're with me But anxiety seeks isolation. I can't control you. So I want to be by myself where nobody can hurt me Fear is temporary because it's about a thing but anxiety is continual because anxiety becomes its own problem Oh, we have a counselor in the church named Jordan her own He worked with veterans and part of his teaching is he has a rope a small piece of rope And he says let me explain to you what your anxiety is doing to you and he gives the The person up he went into the rope and he says now I'm the I'm anxiety And in between us, there's this huge golf of despair And I'm going to pull you in And then the other person starts pulling back and pull back all you want I'm pulling you in as a matter of fact the more you pull the harder I pull And What are you going to do to keep me from pulling you into the despair now? This is an interesting test I've actually done it with people Just to see if it's true and it's true someone who does not struggle with anxiety will let go of the rope every time Like I know what you pull me into the spiral just let go that's dumb somebody who actually struggles with it It never occurs in the let go anxiety becomes your it's own thing And you can't stop controlling It's continual And and I'm not know I'm just I don't think there's something to blame you for anxiety It's just a thing that's out there and some of us are born with it and some of us kind of develop it through practice But it's not healthy fear we need to learn to let go of it And we learn to let go of it by feeding our faith Healthy fear takes us toward eternal life sweet little Jackson boy God's in my room He's in your room can I hide from him? No, he can't hide from it. He sees me. He sees you That that begins the process of how God has designed you to find peace in him It's through your fear. He says it several times in the Old Testament The beginning of wisdom is fear of the Lord It's not the end by definition the beginning is not the end Well, how does it end that ends in first John 4 where he says perfect love is cast away all fear There's no fear in love fear has to do with punishment How do we get there? To tell you how we get there I want to use three stories From Peter the apostle Peter and they all involve boats three times it did Peter is in the boat with Jesus First time Jesus is teaching on the shore the crowd grows He asked Peter can I get in your boat so more people can hear me Peter likes your Pettles him out of the water he teaches over the water so people can hear him more his voice will carry and then to Well, because he knows everything Jesus looks at Peter says put your nut down here. You'll catch some fish And Peter says something interesting and I want you to pay attention to it. He says sir. We have toiled all night
Is there a better description of anxiety than that Toiling all night Can't sleep I can't rest My well-being depends upon my performance. I'm the only thing I can trust. I must work or work work where I won't be safe And Jesus says put your nut down here and he puts them down and then that's filled with fish and he drags them in And then what's his response is his response? Thank you, sir. Will you please come fishing with us again? Is his response you're obviously the Lord let me follow you know his response was depart from me I'm a sinful man He fears the Lord he realizes he's in the presence of someone holy and he fears him and he asks the Lord to get away from him He has fear because he's sinful and he's dirty and he doesn't want to be seen And Jesus is following me and I'll make you fishers of men and he does follow him And a few weeks later they're they're in the boat again. They're going across the sea of Galilee and a storm blows up and Jesus is at rest Being at peace with the Lord. He's at peace with all things and he's at rest and and he's sleeping in the back of the boat But the disciples are terrified and they come and they get him they wake him up Don't you care that we're about to die and Jesus gets up and he speaks to the rain he speaks to the wind. He says be still There are things quiet now And it says the disciples were terrified Who is this who speaks to the wind and the rain That's the they realized they were in the presence of God himself that that They were in the presence of the one who could quiet the storms And there was no place to hide from him And they they continue to follow him and they they saw him on the cross and on the cross they see The true fear of the Lord They see what what send deserves and what holiness looks like and and deeper than that They began to see that that's the love of God poured out that he was doing that for them And they see him resurrected And then the last time they're in the boat and see Jesus Jesus again tells them to throw out their nets and they again catch the fish and through that they realize that this The stranger on the coast is is Jesus himself and and Peter says it's the Lord And he throws himself into the lake He's doing anything he can to get there as fast and he wants to get to Jesus as fast as he possibly can And his fear that that initial fear that that was went from Saying depart for me is now saying you're the only place of safety You're the only place where where everything will be at rest
And so the answer the question is the question is how what about do with my anxiety the answer is come to Jesus with your anxiety And stay there until he comforts you When you when you feel that reality it just changes everything it does he's still act wisely of course but what But you lay down asleep You rest Because you know the the Lord is on your side you know that he loves you and he's embraced you So that if you die you get to be with Jesus and if you live you get to live for Jesus and if you get Fired then you get that's good. That means your money's taken away It's no longer between you and Jesus and and if you make a whole lot of money Then that's wonderful because you get to go and spend it for Jesus and and whatever you do whether you live or die You can be content because it comes from the Lord's hand And he's for you And you know that you're here on Labor Day But is it comforting you is it a day in day out comfort That Jesus is on your side Or is your only comfort in what you're able to control
And I think that question is answered by simply asking this Which reality are you feeding? I mean we live in between two absolute truths God is on our side he is for us if he is for us who can be against us And this world is a dangerous place quote Cool hand Luke nobody's gonna get out of it alive Which reality are you feeding? How much time are you spending feeding this truth that you belong to the Lord? How much time are you spending feeding the dangers of this world? How much time are you are you spending looking at everything wrong with the world? Whether it be through news or whatever your favorite method is and how much time do you spend feeding Reminding yourself of how much he loves you Is that the only place to find peace That's what we want you to have I want you to understand what it means to be still and know He is the Lord he's on your side He's with you Please pray with me Father in heaven is hard You know that it's hard because you are Everywhere but you're also invisible It's hard to see you And these dangers that we fear they seem like they are visible everywhere So I pray that you give us the eyes of faith So that we would believe that you can be trusted and that we are safe in you
I pray that we would find a rest in you Thank you Lord that you don't wait for us to perfect ourselves But that you accept us with our anxiety You love us just just with it I pray in Jesus name Amen I believe you won't we'll never Door ourselves in front of the door But I want to try to answer a couple questions I got a few good ones I got one that's just too hard for me to do off the top of my head And so I will if you I don't know who this is but I will email you and answer this week. I promise That sounds very difficult All right, let's let me look at the ones that did get though That I can answer Rock and try to answer The Lord leads us and guides us yet I'm also afraid of messing up That great Describe you That's anxiety right there What does childlike trust look like in the view of this adult life making decisions and confronting our own sin There's a there's a great scene in the movie The documentary series where it was was in a documentary called Land of Brothers And kind of a hero in the in the story. It's true stories all for Grab this guy who was acting cowardly and he said to the guy Your problem is you think you have a chance of getting out of here live If you'll just resign yourself to the truth that you're going to die in Germany and war You could be a helpful soldier now Maybe in a bad example, look string, but You're gonna mess up if you'll embrace that you'll find a lot of freedom uh The people who seem to have the hardest time in life are the people who don't Can't admit that And you're going to mess up of course you're gonna mess up and the Lord wants you with your messiness I don't understand that well. I do understand it's because he loves you He loves the real you Not the perfect you that you think you ought to be not the idealized you He loves the messy you that actually exists and he's gonna want he promises to use all of your mistakes And all of your mess ups for your good and for his glory. He's gonna use them And that's what living by by faith really is it's it's believing Yeah, I'm gonna act wisely and I'm gonna act prudently and I'm going to do You know the wise things often as I can and I'm gonna trust him that the Lord is going to use my mistakes And he's going to to bless those and um and use them for my good. So were you asking a question or a question?
That's fine. I don't have any more. I will get one more about children Me and ask you just right here and then I'll let you go
What are some practical steps to stop trying to this is funny. I love the way it's worded What are some practical steps to stop trying to control people and relieving that anxiety? Now we all know what people you're talking about here, right? The people who look like me and share my last name that are small and and the answer to that is Feeding your faith Giving your children or your friendships or whatever it is you're trying to control Giving them to the Lord and letting him be the Lord You're not Tim Keller says that Anxiety regress at regret is the belief that God got something wrong Anxiety is the belief that he's going to get something wrong I can't trust the Lord so I have to control it myself Um, and I think that's very accurate in this case that I Giving your children or your friends or your spouse or whoever it is you're trying to control Giving them to the Lord is a daily activity. Well, I got to trust you with him I give them to you And if they wander away from you and me for a while I'm going to trust that you're going to bring them back But I can't control that And you can and you're good And you're for me and you promise that you're for me So I'm going to give that to you So that's uh, and again, it's a daily thing I don't think anxiety is something for any of us some of us have a lot more than others But none of us can just kick it It's something you just kind of live with and you kind of go through the process day in and day out and There are tools you can use if you're struggling with it I uh, I used a tool called headspace and um People told me that if I put it on my phone, it would help and I put it on my phone. It didn't help And then they said well, you have to open the app and actually do the thing So I started doing the thing and uh, you know, 10 minutes a day and it started helping and and Bianca asked It's a little bit of a skeptical tone How is it helping? What does it do for you? And I said it gets me into this moment And then in a perfect question for someone who's never struggled with anxiety What's so great about this moment And I said I'm safe in this moment I am Right It gets me out of the land of the what ifs It gets me out of the time period of the future when something might happen And it gets me right here where nothing bad is happening And That's that's really is a big part of developing this peace and and then trusting the Lord with your future um He holds tomorrow. We don't So all right, that's the best I got for you